A professional career isn’t all increasing pay-checks, award ceremonies, and gold watches. A lot of the time, working in an office can be pretty boring and predictable – the kind of petty squabbles and peculiar workplace politics that were commemorated in the recent hit sitcoms that spanned trans-Atlantic work culture.
However, we felt a more poetic interpretation of these daily rituals was overdue, so we’ve created a new set of haikus on some of the most familiar office scenarios that we encounter each day.
Office life would be impossible without the hot drinks run – both the opportunity to have something comforting to drink, and to get away from the desk for five minutes! Take too large an order, though, and this dreamy mid-morning escape can soon become a nightmare.
Returning from holiday
You work hard 48 weeks a year to get the odd three or four weeks off – the proportions don’t look very promising, do they? Particularly when you factor in how terrible it can feel to get back to work when you were on such a high just a couple of days back on the beach.
Accidental “reply all”
The accidental “reply all” is the new “being overheard on the phone” – only now, you only have yourself to blame. If you respond to a group email with a meme that undercuts something someone has said, double-check you’re only sending it to the person you intended.
What did we do before computers, huh? Well, we didn’t have to deal with snarky IT managers for a start. Best keep your smart phone nearby so you can keep an eye on your incoming emails – this looks like it could take a while to fix.
Conference call pains
Videophones weren’t meant to be like this. We were supposed to look all cool and cyberpunky. Instead, you just have to hope there wasn’t a glitch when you mentioned the most important detail of your meeting.
Cheap, bad cake two or three times a week, all year round. No, I do not wish to contribute yet another gift that will only end up in a thrift shop!
The Wi-Fi cuts out
A more contemporary nightmare: suddenly you’re cut off from everyone in the world – except for your meatspace colleagues! Yet, before you know it, you’re bonding with them like never before. Does the internet bring us together or keep us apart?
Did you order coffee, or coffee and a conversation? Sometimes there’s not enough coffee in the world to get you through a colleague’s politically dubious discourse.
Monday morning zombie
It’s inhuman. Monday mornings should start in the afternoon, right? Production would go up, and brain-eating would go down. Everyone wins.
Ah, elevator purgatory! You don’t want to reach your floor and have to start work, but nor are you sure how many times you can smile and nod at the guy from the floor above yours who you don’t really know. And coming down again at the end of the day… why does it take even longer?
Can you come up with any more haikus which celebrate office life? Tweet them to us at @CareerCamel.
Featured photo: Michael Wimpee / Flickr